


welcome to marvel high

by kjyd



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Chatting & Messaging, F/F, F/M, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Pansexual Wade Wilson, Pining, Slow Burn, Trans Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 11:40:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29009931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kjyd/pseuds/kjyd
Summary: mercwithamouth: let me be gay and let the miscommunication trope handle everythingnessalysle: you’re pan wademercwithamouth: shhnessalysle: i think he’s jealous tbhmercwithamouth: of what?????nessalysle: .....mercwithamouth: gwen’s not dating anyone???nessalysle: JEALOUS OF ME, U DUMBFUCK———another overdone high school au texting fic
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	1. last day of summer

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [skate fast eat ass](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16289576) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account). 



> spideypool-centric and a mix of the movies, comics, and just other fics!
> 
> everyone is a junior or senior in high school unless said otherwise (16-18 yrs old)
> 
> the school system is based off of mine and it’s super old fashioned so sorry if some things don’t make sense, i’m always willing to explain it just lmk!
> 
> tags will be updated as time goes on and updates will probably be irregular since i'm writing this on my phone during my free time for fun :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **monday, september 2.** aka labor day, where the ironfam goes to six flags, the avengers talk about new students, wade and peter are pining, and most of the teachers suck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi y’all! this is the very first chapter of my new fic! sorta terrible so far, but i hope you enjoy???

“ironfam”

_**members:** _

bruce banner ( **greenbean** )

harley keener ( **garageguy** )

james rhodes ( **rhodeybear** )

pepper potts ( **saltnpeppa** )

peter parker ( **beterbarker** )

tony stark ( **ironstark** )

_monday, september 2_

**ironstark** : LAST YR OF HS LETS GOOOOOO

 **garageguy** : please stop

 **garageguy** : im literally gonna cry

 **ironstark** : HAHAHAHAH

 **garageguy** : please please stop

 **ironstark** : NEVER

 **rhodeybear** : it’s alright guys

 **rhodeybear** : you just have two years until you can leave

 **beterbarker** : stopppp

 **beterbarker** : that's so longggggg

 **beterbarker** : i hate school so much

 **ironstark** : doesnt everyone

 **beterbarker** : ughhhh

 **garageguy** : ahahahha imagine having jameson for another year

 **ironstark** : HDSJHDJAH

 **ironstark** : ACTUALLY?????

 **beterbarker** : shut UP

 **ironstark** : LMAO POOR PETE

 **rhodeybear** : yikes good luck kid

 **beterbarker** : i actually hate him ughhh

 **beterbarker** : all he does is complain and shout

 **beterbarker** : i have a headache every time i leave his class

 **beterbarker** : so much respect for the ppl in newspaper club

 **beterbarker** : how tf can they stand him

 **garageguy** : haahahahahahhaha sucks to be u

 **garageguy** : i got reid

 **garageguy** : sorta sketchy but at least she's not jameson!!!

 **rhodeybear** : oh i had reid last year

 **rhodeybear** : she was alright ig

 **rhodeybear** : she's one of those strict teachers who thinks everything's a symbol and makes you take notes on everything

 **rhodeybear** : i have erskine this year and i've heard he's p chill so that's nice

 **rhodeybear** : but jameson sucks ass sorry pete

 **beterbarker** : wait are you taking ap lit or english 12

 **rhodeybear** : ap lit

 **rhodeybear** : wish me luck

 **beterbarker** : lmk how the year goes!!

 **beterbarker** : idk if i wanna take it or not

 **rhodeybear** : either way erskine teaches both so it should be fine

 **beterbarker** : apparently we have a psych teacher now

 **beterbarker** : and he took over harrington for ap bio

 **beterbarker** : i think he's mr. lehnsherr's husband???

 **beterbarker** : so that's pretty cool ig

 **greenbean** : dr. xavier??

 **beterbarker** : yeah i think that's his name

 **greenbean** : i've read his theses

 **greenbean** : they're pretty good ig

 **greenbean** : psychology and genetics aren't really my thing but they were interesting

 **garageguy** : nerd

 **greenbean** : yep :)

 **ironstark** : MR. LEHNSHERR’S MARRIED????

 **ironstark** : TEH FUCK????

 **ironstark** : WHO WAS GONNA TELL ME THAY

 **beterbarker** : i just told you

 **ironstark** : very funny pete

 **ironstark** : i can’t believe he’s married wtf

 **ironstark** : next thing you’re gonna tell me he has kids

 **rhodeybear** : ....

 **rhodeybear** : he does

 **rhodeybear** : where tf have you been tony

 **rhodeybear** : you know wanda and pietro??

 **ironstark** : n o

 **ironstark** : w a y ????

 **ironstark** : the maximoff twins????

 **ironstark** : really???

 **ironstark** : lehnsherr's SCARY

 **ironstark** : the twins are so nice tho????

 **garageguy** : wait really

 **garageguy** : idk pietro that well but

 **garageguy** : wanda HATES me

 **garageguy** : but that's probably because i blew up the lab on her first day

 **beterbarker** : hmm i wonder why she hates you

 **ironstark** : why don’t their last names match

 **rhodeybear** : their mom’s last name

 **ironstark** : holy shit

 **ironstark** : my life has been a lie

 **garageguy** : i've never actually had lehnsherr

 **garageguy** : how is he

 **greenbean** : he teaches enviro

 **greenbean** : he's a pretty good teacher, just sorta scary looking

 **ironstark** : i haven't had him either but he hates me :((

 **garageguy** : everyone hates you

 **garageguy** : that doesn't rlly tell me anything

 **ironstark** : WOW OK

 **ironstark** : I SEE HOW IT IS

 **ironstark** : OUCH

 **garageguy** : :)

 **ironstark** : what other teachers have kids who go here

 **greenbean** : uhhh i think mr. howlett fosters wade wilson???? not sure tho

 **ironstark** : howlett????

 **greenbean** : maybe you know him as logan

 **ironstark** : OH

 **ironstark** : huh

 **ironstark** : he teaches spanish, right?

 **beterbarker** : yeah

 **ironstark** : damn i barely know anything abt this school

 **ironstark** : but it's fine bc i'm GRADUATING soon

 **beterbarker** : fuck off

 **garageguy** : ...i thought coach wilson was related to wade wilson

 **ironstark** : wowww

 **ironstark** : harley i thought you were supposed to be one of the smart kids

 **garageguy** : THEY HAVE THE SAME LAST NAME

 **ironstark** : THEY LITERALLY LOOK NOTHING ALIKE????

 **garageguy** : THEY DONT HAVE TO LOOK ALIKE TO BE RELATED

 **ironstark** : WELL THEY DONT HAVE TO HAVE THE SAME NAME TO BE RELATED

 **rhodeybear** : you were literally the one who asked why the maximoffs don’t have lehnsherr’s name

 **ironstark** : shut up rhodey

 **ironstark** : anyway

 **ironstark** : everyone knows wade has daddy issues so

 **garageguy** : everyone in this school has daddy issues stark

 **ironstark** : ...you know, i was gonna deny that but

 **ironstark** : thinking abt it now

 **ironstark** : yeah i'm pretty sure you're right

 **garageguy** : ofc i'm right

 **garageguy** : i'm always right

 **ironstark** : mmm sure

 **ironstark** : i mean,,, wade wilson related to coach wilson ok

 **ironstark** : also where did honeybear go :(((

 **ironstark:** he keeps hopping on and off :((

 **garageguy:** he's probably being rEsPoNsIbLe

 **ironstark:** ew gross

 **ironstark:** anyway

 **ironstark:** IRONFAM ITS OUR LAST DAY BEFORE THE SRS LAST YR OF SCHOOL

 **ironstark:** LET'S GO TO SIX FLAGS OR SMTH

 **greenbean:** are parks even open on labor day

 **ironstark:** eh who cares

 **ironstark:** if it fails then we can just go somewhere else or i can bribe someone idc

 **beterbarker:** but we have to get ready for school

 **ironstark:** fuck school!

 **beterbarker:** ...

 **beterbarker:** yeah alright

 **beterbarker:** fuck school

 **ironstark:** i'll pick y'all up

 **greenbean:** ...please don't

 **ironstark:** what's wrong with my driving brucie bear :(

 **greenbean:** everything

 **greenbean:** you are terrible at driving

 **greenbean:** i'm surprised you didn't have to pay off the instructor

 **ironstark:** RUDE

 **ironstark** : harley appreciates my driving

 **greenbean:** that's because he's just as insane as you

 **ironstark:** i'm hurt :(

 **garageguy:** me too :(

 **beterbarker:** it’s the truth

 **beterbarker:** like father like son

 **ironstark:** HWAT

 **garageguy:** HES NOT MY DAD

 **ironstark:** IM NOT HIS DAD

 **beterbarker:** dhsjhdsj

 **greenbean:** you’re one to talk pete

 **beterbarker:** MOVING ON

 **beterbarker:** rhodey is probably the best driver out of all of us

 **beterbarker:** i vote he drive us

 **ironstark:** he isnt even here to volunteer

 **ironstark:** also why is he the best

 **ironstark:** also i’m not harley’s dad

 **beterbarker:** 1) bruce has road rage

 **beterbarker:** 2) you and harley drive FAST

 **beterbarker:** 3) pepper doesn’t like driving

 **beterbarker:** 4) i suck at driving

 **ironstark:** ...fair enough

 **ironstark:** PLATYPUS WE NEED YOU

 **ironstark:** SUNSHINE IM GOING TO UR HOUSE RN

 **ironstark:** PLEASE DONT BE NAKED

 **ironstark:** OR DO

 **ironstark:** IDC

 **ironstark:** ILL ENJOY THE VIEW EITHER WAY

———

“2 kewl 4 skool”

**_members:_ **

bruce banner ( **greenbean** )

clint barton ( **legolas** )

james rhodes ( **rhodeybear** )

natasha romanoff ( **blckwdw** )

sam wilson ( **falcon** )

steve rogers ( **icedamericano** )

thor odinson ( **lordofthunder** )

tony stark ( **ironstark** )

_monday, september 2_

**icedamericano:** Last year of high school!

 **icedamericano:** Are you excited for college!?

 **falcon:** why the fuck does steve sound like a camp counselor

 **ironstark:** lmAO i can see that

 **icedamericano:** I was actually a camp counselor last year.

 **icedamericano:** It was pretty fun.

 **ironstark:** fhjshd i can’t stand children srry

 **ironstark:** they cry too much :/

 **falcon:** i love kids

 **ironstark:** ofc u do

 **ironstark:** ur the mom friend

 **falcon:** damn thanks stark

 **falcon:** that makes me feel all gooey inside

 **ironstark:** ur welcome

 **icedamericano:** Apparently, there’s a bunch of new students this year.

 **blckwdw:** yep

 **blckwdw:** my friend’s transferring from hydra

 **blckwdw:** if any of you insult him they won't be able to find your body

 **ironstark:** can i get a buzzfeed unsolved video

 **blckwdw:** are you saying that you're going to insult him?

 **ironstark:** no!

 **ironstark:** i'm just saying that when u inevitably murder me make sure that they never find my body

 **blckwdw:** hm

 **icedamericano:** What’s his name?

 **blckwdw:** james barnes

 **icedamericano:** ...James Barnes? Goes by Bucky?

 **blckwdw:** i call him james but yeah him

 **icedamericano:** Oh! How do you know him?

 **ironstark:** do YOU know him???

 **icedamericano:** Yeah, we used to be neighbors.

 **falcon:** what happened?

 **icedamericano:** He moved away after his parents died in a car accident.

 **blckwdw:** i met him at the gym last year

 **icedamericano:** Cool.

 **ironstark:** i’m not judging you steve but

 **ironstark:** Cool.

 **icedamericano:** Fuck off, Stark.

 **falcon:** language

 **blckwdw:** language ;)

 **ironstark:** lAnGuAgE

 **icedamericano:** I hate all of you.

 **icedamericano:** Any other new kids?

 **ironstark:** ik theres stephen strange

 **ironstark:** met him at a science convention or smth a while ago

 **icedamericano:** Do you guys know any incoming freshmen?

 **ironstark:** i think pete is tutoring one? idk his name tho

 **icedamericano:** Aw, that's cute.

 **icedamericano:** He's coming to Marvel?

 **ironstark:** yeah i'm pretty sure

 **ironstark:** the reason why they started tutoring was so that he could be prepared for the test and i'm assuming he got in

 **lordofthunder:** WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT?

 **ironstark:** jesus thor

 **ironstark:** lowercase pls

 **lordthunder:** sorry

 **lordofthunder:** what are we talking about?

 **ironstark:** new kids

 **lordofthunder:** oh! my friend brunnhilde is coming to our school

 **falcon:** pretty name

 **lordofthunder:** yes!

 **lordofthunder:** she is named after the valkyrie in norse myth so we call her valkyrie or val sometimes

 **ironstark:** what’s up with y’all’s obsession with norse myth

 **lordofthunder:** tradition

 **ironstark:** huh

 **ironstark:** what happens when you run out of names

 **lordofthunder:** reuse the names?

 **falcon:** damn i want a cool name

 **falcon:** i’m just sam

 **ironstark:** sam i am

 **ironstark:** i like green eggs and ham

 **falcon:** thank you for your contribution

 **ironstark:** ur welc

 **blckwdw:** please never say that again

 **ironstark:** sorry nat

 **ironstark:** anywaysss

 **ironstark:** we’ve got a bucky (james?)

 **ironstark:** a stephen (hey steve u and stephen can be stev/phen pals)

 **ironstark:** and a val (or valkyrie or brunnhilde who knows)

 **icedamericano:** You aren’t funny.

 **ironstark:** ouch that hurts cap

 **blckwdw:** no he’s right

 **ironstark:** betrayal!!!!

 **ironstark:** ANWYAY

 **ironstark:** why do i say anyways so much smh

 **ironstark:** a n y w a y

 **ironstark:** apparently a bunch of ppl from hydra are transferring over???

 **ironstark:** i mean,, i'm sure there's some good ppl there (pls don't hurt me nat) but a bunch of them are douchebags

 **blckwdw:** mmm fair

 **blckwdw:** tbh the only mildly good things that come from hydra are me and james

 **blckwdw:** everyone else can just fuck off

 **ironstark:** yeah apparently pierce and zola used to work there

 **ironstark:** and surprise!! they're the sucky ones

 **falcon:** wait pierce worked at hydra?????

 **icedamericano:** Who's Pierce?

 **blckwdw:** he teaches ap gov and econ

 **icedamericano:** Oh.

 **ironstark:** yeah he worked at hydra

 **ironstark:** he just got the job here bc he's friends with fury

 **falcon:** ...isn't that how everyone gets their jobs??

 **ironstark:** apparently when fury was in the military he helped with a hostage situation and pierce's daughter was a hostage soo

 **ironstark:** friends!

 **falcon:** ...damn

 **ironstark:** pierce tells that story to everyone idk why

 **icedamericano:** Wow.

 **icedamericano:** What about Zola?

 **blckwdw:** hydra fired zola after he got mad about some of their rules?? they never specified which one in the letter

 **icedamericano:** I'm not even going to question why you've read Zola's private mail.

 **blckwdw:** he's creepy

 **ironstark:** yeah he is

 **ironstark:** i had him last year and... yikes

 **falcon:** ap chem???

 **ironstark:** yeah

 **falcon:** wait but you said a bunch of ppl are transferring from hydra??

 **ironstark:** i THINK

 **ironstark:** just a rumor

 **ironstark:** i guess we'll see tmr!!

———

“ironfam”

_**members:** _

bruce banner ( **greenbean** )

harley keener ( **garageguy** )

james rhodes ( **rhodeybear** )

pepper potts ( **saltnpeppa** )

peter parker ( **beterbarker** )

tony stark ( **ironstark** )

_monday, september 2_

**beterbarker:** IM LITERALLY GONNA KILL YOU

 **ironstark:** what did harley do now

 **garageguy:** HEY

 **garageguy:** WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I DID SOMETHING

 **ironstark:** it’s always you

 **garageguy:** rude!!!!

 **beterbarker:** HE MADE ME GO ON THE SUPER TWISTY ROLLERCOASTER

 **beterbarker:** I JUST THREW UP AND ITS UR FAULT

 **beterbarker:** FUCK YOU

 **garageguy:** ewww no

 **garageguy:** ur like my brother

 **beterbarker:** .....

 **beterbarker:** ...........

 **beterbarker:** .................

 **beterbarker:** omg harls

 **beterbarker:** were those.... emotions????

 **garageguy:** no

 **beterbarker:** oh my god those were emotions

 **ironstark:** ew emotions

 **beterbarker:** awww harley i knew you loved me!!!!

 **garageguy:** i hate you

 **beterbarker:** suree

 **ironstark:** e w

 **ironstark:** e m o t i o n s

 **garageguy:** ^^^

 **rhodeybear:** you love us we know

 **ironstark:** gross

 **beterbarker:** hey that wasn’t a denial tony!!!

 **beterbarker:** i knew you loved us :)))

 **ironstark:** absolutely not

 **garageguy:** you sound really convincing ngl

 **ironstark:** shut up

 **rhodeybear:** :’)

 **ironstark:** shut up

 **ironstark:** :(

 **beterbarker:** don’t tell me what to do, you’re not my dad!!

 **ironstark:** WAIT WTF ARE U DISOWNING ME

 **ironstark:** I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR DAD

 **garageguy:** LMAO TONY

 **garageguy:** WERE THOSE

 **garageguy:** E M O T I O N S ???

 **greenbean:** ngl i’m taking a screenshot for the next time he denies parentage

 **rhodeybear:** i thought u weren’t their dad

 **ironstark:** no i said i wasn’t harley’s dad

 **ironstark:** i’m peter’s dad

 **ironstark:** harley can burn in hell for all i care

 **garageguy:** :(((

 **garageguy:** but peter’s my bro so u gotta be my dad

 **ironstark:** no

 **beterbarker:** no he’s right

 **ironstark:** no

 **beterbarker:** adopt him for me???

 **ironstark:** no

 **ironstark:** fuck

 **ironstark:** fine

 **ironstark:** say hi to ur new brother

 **beterbarker:** HA I KNEW U LOVED US!!!!

 **ironstark:** no i hate harley

 **ironstark:** i can adopt him but still hate him

 **beterbarker:** <3

 **ironstark:** fuck OFF

 **beterbarker:** :(((

 **rhodeybear:** don’t yell at your son tony

 **beterbarker:** :(((((

 **ironstark:** ugh im SORRY

 **beterbarker:** :()

 **ironstark:** tf is that???

 **beterbarker:** :(

 **ironstark:** im OSRRY

 **beterbarker:** :)

 **beterbarker:** thanks dad!

 **ironstark:** eww

 **ironstark:** for the love of god please don't change my contact to dad

 **beterbarker:** i mean i could if i wanted to

 **beterbarker:** it's not like i have an actual dad that it could be confused with

 **garageguy:** i mean

 **garageguy:** he could still be at 7-11 or maybe his car broke down but until then same

 **ironstark:** ............

 **ironstark:** i'm just gonna ignore all of that

 **beterbarker:** ;)

 **garageguy:** ;)

 **ironstark:** ........

 **ironstark:** ALRIGHT THEN MOVING ON

 **saltnpeppa:** You guys text so much.

 **ironstark:** or not

 **ironstark:** sorry pep

 **beterbarker:** sorry pepper

 **garageguy:** i’m not sorry

 **beterbarker:** shut up harley

———

“absolutely nothing illegal over here”

_**members:** _

jack hammer ( **popgoestheweasel** )

neena thurman ( **domino** )

vanessa carlysle ( **nessalysle** )

wade wilson ( **mercwithamouth** )

_monday, september 2_

**mercwithamouth:** READY FOR ANOTHER YEAR OF PINING OVER PETER PARKER WHO DOESNT KNO I EXIST AND IS PROBABLY SUPER DUPER STRAIGHT???????????????

 **popgoestheweasel:** Kill me now

 **nessalysle:** awww wease don’t be like that

 **nessalysle:** i think it's adorable

 **popgoestheweasel:** it's pathetic

 **nessalysle:** shhh

 **nessalysle:** it's adorable

 **nessalysle:** and sorta fun to make fun of

 **popgoestheweasel:** it's annoying

 **nessalysle:** funny!

 **mercwithamouth:** ITS NOTTT

 **mercwithamouth:** ITS ABSOLUTELY TRAGIC :(((

 **mercwithamouth:** hes probably dating gwen stacy or mary jane or someone

 **mercwithamouth:** last yr fucking SUCKED

 **mercwithamouth:** u could see his hard on for michelle jones frm SPACE

 **mercwithamouth:** GUYS PAY ATTENTION TO ME

 **mercwithamouth:** IM IN PAIN

 **mercwithamouth:** HELP ME

 **domino:** he’s not dating anyone right now but

 **domino:** i’m pretty sure he has a gigantic crush on gwen stacy

 **domino:** it’s obvious as fuck

 **mercwithamouth:** :(((((((

 **mercwithamouth:** another year w/ a broken heart :(

 **mercwithamouth:** this is what i get for liking perfect peter parker

 **popgoestheweasel:** huh is he actually called that

 **mercwithamouth:** i mean,,, hes Perfect so yeah

 **mercwithamouth:** ask someone else and theyll probably agree w/ me

 **nessalysle:** mmhm

 **nessalysle:** he’s cute and smart and friends with the popular folk

 **mercwithamouth:** which means that i super duper dont deserve him

 **mercwithamouth:** at least he'll be happy

 **mercwithamouth:** thats all i want him to be

 **mercwithamouth:** damn im in deep

 **popgoestheweasel:** yepppppp

 **mercwithamouth:** wtf is wrong w/ me

 **popgoestheweasel:** literally everything

 **mercwithamouth:** shut up weasel

 **mercwithamouth:** hhhhh i shoul dprobably just get over him

 **mercwithamouth:** as long as hes happy its fine!!!!!

 **mercwithamouth:** its whatever im fine

 **nessalysle:** it’ll all work out in the end wade

 **mercwithamouth:** ness ily but its rlly not helping

 **nessalysle:** hey you’ve got two yrs to win his heart

 **nessalysle:** there’s still time darling

 **mercwithamouth:** :(((((

 **mercwithamouth:** thx nessie

 **popgoestheweasel:** tbh just give up wade

 **popgoestheweasel:** its sorta hopeless

 **popgoestheweasel:** and fucking depressing

 **popgoestheweasel:** its been going on since freshman year and uve done nothing but pine since then

 **nessalysle:** shut up weasel

 **mercwithamouth:** shUT UP WEASEL NOBODY WAS ASKING FOR UR OPINION

 **mercwithamouth:** nessa if nothing works out w/ me and petey ill marry u

 **nessalysle:** wow wade its nice to know where i stand

 **mercwithamouth:** nooo i didnt mean it like tht nessie

 **mercwithamouth:** foot meet mouth

 **mercwithamouth:** i mean that ur amazing and itd be an honor to date u becasue ur wonderful except i cant date u because my fcking heart hates me and decides hey lets go for ppl who will never ever veer b attracted to us and our scarred ass but ur amazing and beautiful and if my heart could just give up on that dumb lil nerd then id absolutely date u for first pick

 **nessalysle:** i love you too <3

 **mercwithamouth:** <3

 **popgoestheweasel:** damn that was soft

 **mercwithamouth:** SHUT UP WEASEL

———

“FCUK ITS A SPIDER”

_**members:** _

gwen stacy ( **gmstacy** )

harry osborn ( **hoesborn** )

mary jane watson ( **maryjanes** )

michelle jones ( **emjones** )

ned leeds ( **nedward** )

peter parker ( **beterbarker** )

_monday, september 2_

**beterbarker:** ready for jr year??

 **hoesborn:** lmao nope

 **emjones:** absolutely not

 **beterbarker:** aw dont be like that

 **nedward:** almost graduation!!!

 **nedward:** then college!!!!

 **emjones:** and student loans

 **beterbarker:** :(

 **beterbarker:** way to darken the mood em

 **hoesborn:** if y’all would just let me.....

 **emjones:** absolutely not

 **nedward:** nah it’s alright har

 **beterbarker:** nooo harry

 **beterbarker:** we’re not friends for your money

 **beterbarker:** we’re friends for you

 **hoesborn:** which is why i want to pay for it

 **hoesborn:** cmon please??

 **hoesborn:** i have the money

 **hoesborn:** and itll make my dad pissed

 **beterbarker:** no harry

 **hoesborn:** ughhh

 **hoesborn:** when you change your mind lmk

 **nedward:** what are you guys doing today

 **emjones:** peter’s at six flags with the iron fam

 **beterbarker:** ???? how do u know

 **emjones:** it’s on your ig story

 **beterbarker:** ironfam???

 **emjones:** group chat name

 **beterbarker:** .... i will never not be scared of u em

 **emjones:** thanks

 **nedward:** have fun pete!!

 **beterbarker:** harley made me throw up but other than that it’s pretty cool

 **hoesborn:** after school tmr yall wanna get boba??

 **beterbarker:** sure

 **emjones:** sounds good

 **nedward:** ok!!!

 **nedward:** also does anybody else have jameson i wanna cry

 **beterbarker:** ME

 **beterbarker:** WE CAN CRY TOGETHER NED I HATE HIM SM

 **nedward:** !!! <3

 **nedward:** wait which section are u in

 **beterbarker:** 1!

 **nedward:** OH THANK GOD

 **beterbarker:** !!! do we have class together

 **nedward:** yes!

 **beterbarker:** !!!!!!!!

 **emjones:** ew you guys are taking english 11?

 **emjones:** imagine not taking ap lang

 **hoesborn:** lmaoooo

 **beterbarker:** i'd take it but :/// essays

 **emjones:** mm yeah i get that

 **emjones:** but???? u risked jameson and i'd def prefer essays over jjj

 **beterbarker:** but last year someone else taught it

 **emjones:** but they retired and we didn't know who was teaching it

 **emjones:** i thought u were good at math peter

 **emjones:** if jjj only teaches english 10 then there's a big chance he's gonna take another class

 **beterbarker:** i knOWWW

 **beterbarker:** and i regret it now :((

 **beterbarker:** but i don't wanna drop just bc of the teacher :/

 **beterbarker:** fuck this year!!

 **gmstacy:** FUCK SCHOOL

 **beterbarker:** ....you okay, gwen?

———

“peter parker’s pining palace”

_**members:** _

harry osborn ( **hoesborn** )

mary jane watson ( **maryjanes** )

michelle jones ( **emjones** )

peter parker ( **beterbarker** )

_monday, september 2_

**hoesborn** : my fucking god pete

 **hoesborn:** could you be any more obvious

 **beterbarker:** I PANICKED

 **beterbarker:** some best friend u r :(

 **hoesborn:** stop with all the punctuation and spelling n all that

 **hoesborn:** its super obvious dude

 **beterbarker:** im SORRY

———

“FCUK ITS A SPIDER”

_**members:** _

gwen stacy ( **gmstacy** )

harry osborn ( **hoesborn** )

mary jane watson ( **maryjanes** )

michelle jones ( **emjones** )

ned leeds ( **nedward** )

peter parker ( **beterbarker** )

_monday, september 2_

**hoesborn:** did gwen stacy just curse school???

 **hoesborn:** damn we havent even started yet

 **gmstacy:** school hasnt started and im stressed

 **gmstacy:** my schedule is packed and im freaking out and tbh this year im probably gonna burn out sorry guys

 **gmstacy:** if i seem distant or snappy pls let me know and ill try to chill or smth

 **gmstacy:** fuck junior year

 **beterbarker:** fuck junior year

 **hoesborn:** FUCK JUNIOR YEAR

 **nedward:** fuck junior year!!

 **emjones:** ....fuck junior year

 **maryjanes:** why are we fucking a year?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m not actually sure if parks are open on labor day but for the sake of the fic pls ignore it! 
> 
> this chapter was supposed to take place on sunday, september 1, and school was originally gonna start on monday, september 2, bc itd be super perfect but then it was labor day??? and i wanted it to be somewhat realistic and have holidays and all that but whatever it's fine
> 
> yes i know that nat was not part of hydra before shield but i just wanted to simplify it so she went to hydra high during her freshman year :/
> 
> so far spideypool is the only set ship so far, so lmk what ships you think would fit (i was originally gonna do stucky and ironstrange but it's lowkey overdone in texting fics and i sorta wanna change that but i still love them and i'm still super willing to do it!!)
> 
> alSO should i add the fantastic four?? lowkey just want to add them solely for the johnny and peter friendship (i love spideytorch sm but this is gonna be spideypool, sorry) 
> 
> the characters from guardians of the galaxy, x-men, and agent carter will be mentioned but i’m not actually gonna add them to the texts bc i don’t think i know them well enough to do so (but i still love them!!), so if you don’t know them you can just treat them as ocs or smth :/ but!! the defenders will be coming next chapter :)


	2. back to school

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **tuesday, september 3.** aka the first day of school, where harry is pissed, jessica dyes her hair, new students are introduced, and wade becomes a dad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wade is scarred but not that scarred? they're from his father's abuse :(
> 
> this entire chapter is basically just introducing more characters and all that, the actual plot (which i haven’t decided yet) and stuff won’t come until much later :(((
> 
> also pretend that harley has always been in the spider squad! at first i wasn't gonna put him in it, but it made more sense than for him to have his own group of friends?? so. he's always been in the spider squad (and peter parker's pining palace, but that group chat hasn't gotten a feature in this chapter)

“FCUK ITS A SPIDER” 

_**members:** _

gwen stacy ( **gmstacy** ) 

harley keener ( **garageguy** ) 

harry osborn ( **hoesborn** ) 

mary jane watson ( **maryjanes** ) 

michelle jones ( **emjones** ) 

ned leeds ( **nedward** ) 

peter parker ( **beterbarker** ) 

_tuesday, september 3_

**hoesborn** **:** the first week of school is literally so POINTLESS 

**hoesborn** **:** "tElL uS wHaT yOu DiD oVeR tHe SuMmEr" 

**hoesborn** **:** "um yeah, hi my name is harry and over the summer i did absolutely nothing!!!!!!!! haha i'm so funny and relatable XD" 

**beterbarker** **:** DFHJDKHFD HAR 

**hoesborn** **:** it's true!! 

**beterbarker** **:** u didn't have to call me out :( 

**hoesborn** **:** AND THEN 

**hoesborn** **:** A N D T H E N 

**hoesborn** **:** A N D T H E N 

**hoesborn** **:** AND THEN WE JUST SPEND THE TIME FILLING OUT SYLLABI 

**hoesborn** **:** AND THEN THE TEACHER SAYS 

**hoesborn** **:** "HEY GUYS WE HAVE A POP QUIZ ON THE SYLLABUS THAT LITERALLY NOBODY READ" 

**hoesborn** **:** WHAT THE FUCK 

**hoesborn** **:** WHY DO WE NEED A Q U I Z ON "cOrE vAlUeS" OR WHATEVER 

**maryjanes** **:** damn harry's salty 

**hoesborn** **:** ITS FUCKING USELESS 

**hoesborn** **:** AND ASKING FATHER TO SIGN ALL OF THEM SUCKS 

**hoesborn** **:** "HEY FATHER CAN U SIGN ALL THESE SHEETS THAT ARE LITERALLY A WASTE OF PAPER BC EVERY ONE SAYS THE EXACT SAME THING" 

**hoesborn** **:** honestly i get why we have syllabi but just??? make it online??? 

**hoesborn** **:** it's 1) waste of paper and 2) ppl barely look at it 

**hoesborn** **:** ok i'm done 

**maryjanes** **:** woww 

**hoesborn** **:** mj pls find us a table 

**hoesborn** **:** ur rooms the closest to the dining hall 

**maryjanes** **:** ugh fine 

**maryjanes** **:** you owe me tho 

**hoesborn** **:** i'll pay for your boba 

**maryjanes** **:** you paid last time tho 

**hoesborn** **:** but i owe youuu 

**maryjanes** **:** fine 

**maryjanes** **:** but i'm paying next time 

**maryjanes** **:** once again, friends for you not your money 

**hoesborn** **:** :) 

**beterbarker** **:** y'all!! i just had ap bio and dr xavier is suchhh a good teacher 

**beterbarker** **:** i mean,, it's only the first day so i can't judge too much but he was really nice!!! 

**maryjanes** **:** tbh lehnsherr seemed a lot happier 

**maryjanes** **:** and i'm assuming it's bc of xavier 

**beterbarker** **:** u take enviro??? 

**maryjanes** **:** yeah 

**beterbarker** **:** OOHOHOHHOHOH 

**beterbarker** **:** ALSO 

**beterbarker** **:** I ALMOST FORGOT 

_**beterbarker** added **whatsupdanger** to the chat _

**beterbarker** **:** WELCOME TO THE SPIDER SQUAD 

**maryjanes** **:** hey miles 

**maryjanes** **:** also who tf chose spider squad for our name 

**beterbarker** **:** yOU can be the baby now!! 

**garageguy** **:** you're still the baby peter 

**garageguy** **:** miles is just the super baby

**beterbarker:** i read that as sugar baby and i was

**garageguy:** i-

**garageguy:** peter

**beterbarker:** yes?

**garageguy:** absolutely not

**garageguy** **:** but anyways hey miles 

**whatsupdanger** **:** hi guys!! 

**hoesborn** **:** OH ITS PETERS SON 

**beterbarker** **:** y'all were the ones who decided to release a bunch of spiders in freshman yr 

**nedward** **:** miles!! 

**whatsupdanger** **:** wait you guys released SPIDERS in the SCHOOL?? 

**hoesborn** **:** absolutely not 

**nedward** **:** what's up man!! 

**emjones** **:** it was actually harry's idea 

**hoesborn** **:** there's no proof 

**whatsupdanger** **:** hi mj! hi harley! hi harry! hi ned! 

**whatsupdanger** **:** (also not peter's son wtf) 

**nedward** **:** what do u think of mhs so far??? 

**hoesborn** **:** also it was absolutely not my fault 

**hoesborn** **:** if it did actually ever happen 

**hoesborn** **:** if it did happen it was because i just happened to buy spiders at the pet store and then the next day they escaped their home!! 

**maryjanes** **:** and u just happened to bring the spiders to school that day? 

**hoesborn** **:** show and tell 

**maryjanes** **:** we're in high school 

**maryjanes** **:** show and tell isn't a thing anymore 

**whatsupdanger** **:** so far it's alright ig 

**hoesborn** **:** shut up emmy 

**whatsupdanger** **:** the ppl here are pretty nice 

**whatsupdanger** **:** also what plans do u guys have for this yr 

**beterbarker** **:** !!! that's good 

**hoesborn** **:** plans? what plans 

**hoesborn** **:** i have no plans 

**hoesborn** **:** even if i did 

**hoesborn** **:** which i don't 

**hoesborn** **:** i wouldn't say it on something that could be hacked :) 

**whatsupdanger** **:** ppl hack ur phone?? 

**hoesborn** **:** i'm harry osborn, ofc they do 

**beterbarker** **:** eat the rich! 

**maryjanes** **:** peter you're literally friends with like... five millionaires or smth 

**beterbarker** **:** eat! the! rich! 

**hoesborn** **:** hell yeah let's do it 

**maryjanes** **:** i'm not even gonna reply to that 

**maryjanes** **:** moving on 

**beterbarker** **:** miles 

**beterbarker** **:** my not so son 

**beterbarker** **:** (does this mean tony's a grandpa or smth???) 

**garageguy** **:** yes 

**beterbarker** **:** (if so pls call him pops or smth) 

**hoesborn** **:** wtf pete 

**garageguy** **:** LMAO 

**garageguy** **:** PLS DO 

**beterbarker** **:** it makes him seem older than he actually is 

**garageguy** **:** YEAH 

**beterbarker** **:** anyways 

**beterbarker** **:** if you can't find a table to sit at during lunch then ur welcome to sit with us 

**beterbarker** **:** honestly i'd try to sit with other ppl in your grade so then u have a good support system in the future 

**beterbarker** **:** but you're always welcome with us :) 

**whatsupdanger** **:** nah it's alright 

**whatsupdanger** **:** some of my friends from bms are here! 

**whatsupdanger:** thanks tho :) 

**beterbarker** **:** okay, good 

**hoesborn** **:** ok but how does peter know everybody 

**hoesborn** **:** like,, ur the textbook definition of a bullied nerd 

**hoesborn** **:** except ur friends with all the popular ppl 

**hoesborn** **:** but somehow that does nothing for ur bullying 

**beterbarker** **:** shdjfs i'm not popular?? 

**whatsupdanger** **:** ...literally everybody knows who u are 

**nedward** **:** ur popular peter 

**beterbarker** **:** ..... 

**beterbarker** **:** i'll take ur word for it 

**beterbarker** **:** anyway 

**beterbarker** **:** let's move on!!! 

**maryjanes** **:** OH IM TAKING THIS SUBJECT CHANGE 

**maryjanes** **:** did you see jessica jones's hair!!! 

**maryjanes** **:** it's soooo pretty 

**beterbarker** **:** ???? WHATD SHE DO 

**maryjanes** **:** she dyed it!! 

**maryjanes** **:** it's like a purpley pink??? idk 

**beterbarker** **:** anD SHE DIDN'T TELL ME????? 

**beterbarker** **:** brb gotta scream at her 

**hoesborn** **:** pete just proving that he knows everyone 

**beterbarker** **:** shut up harry 

**beterbarker** **:** we were trying to change the subject 

——— 

“eww rmr midtown? :/” 

_**members:** _

jessica jones ( **jessjones** ) 

peter parker ( **beterbarker** ) 

_tuesday, september 3_

**beterbarker** **:** JESS WHEN TF DID YOU DYE YOUR HAIR 

**jessjones** **:** yesterday? 

**beterbarker** **:** HWAT 

**beterbarker** **:** anD YOU DIDNT TELL ME???? 

**beterbarker** **:** pics pics pics! 

**jessjones** **:** no 

**jessjones** **:** you’re literally gonna see me during lunch 

**beterbarker** **:** PICS PICS PICS 

**jessjones** **:** jfc 

**jessjones** **:** fine 

**jessjones** **:** _[hair.jpg]_

**beterbarker** **:** AAA UR HAIRS SO PRETTY 

**beterbarker** **:** YOU LOOK AMAZING 

**beterbarker** **:** are you SMILING????? 

**jessjones** **:** absolutely not 

**jessjones** **:** but thanks 

**beterbarker** **:** i was thinking of dying my hair :) 

**jessjones** **:** do it 

**jessjones** **:** like... a red or blue??? 

**beterbarker** **:** !!!!!! 

**beterbarker** **:** how'd u know those were my fave colors :') 

**jessjones** **:** guessed 

**beterbarker** **:** suree 

**beterbarker** **:** not bc u remember random facts abt ur friends???? 

**jessjones** **:** shush parker 

**beterbarker** **:** i was thinking like,, pastel blue 

**jessjones** **:** yeah 

**jessjones** **:** do it 

**jessjones** **:** trish did mine 

**jessjones** **:** i can send her your way 

**beterbarker** **:** !!! ok i'll ask her 

——— 

"seniors!!!!" 

_**members:** _

claire temple ( **notadoctor** ) 

colleen wing ( **dragonwings** ) 

danny rand ( **danielrand** ) 

foggy nelson ( **fogsnelson** ) 

frank castle ( **castleglione** ) 

jessica jones ( **jessjones** ) 

luke cage ( **lukecagee** ) 

matt murdock ( **mmmurdock** ) 

_tuesday, september 3_

**notadoctor** **:** this year i'm no longer taking care of your injuries 

**jessjones** **:** you say that every year 

**notadoctor** **:** >:( 

**notadoctor** **:** shut up jess 

**notadoctor** **:** i heard that there's a guy who wants to be a doctor 

**notadoctor** **:** go meet him 

**jessjones** **:** stephen strange?? 

**jessjones** **:** he wants to be a neurosurgeon 

**notadoctor** **:** and i want to be a nurse 

**notadoctor** **:** and i only know some first aid 

**notadoctor** **:** so please just go to the hospital when you get hurt 

**jessjones** **:** hm 

**danielrand** **:** we appreciate you claire!! 

**notadoctor** **:** you can appreciate me in the hospital 

**lukecagee** **:** YALL 

**lukecagee** **:** THIS CLASS IS SO CHAOTIC 

**jessjones** **:** ap gov?? 

**lukecagee** **:** it’s just passive aggressive remarks abt capitalism 

**lukecagee** **:** i think trish is actually recording it fhdjhds 

**jessjones** **:** ofc she is 

**jessjones** **:** who is in it? 

**lukecagee** **:** uhhh, lemme see 

**lukecagee** **:** nelson, rhodes, hammer, stahl, carter, rogers, thor, and trish are the ppl ik 

**lukecagee** **:** there's a few new ppl 

**lukecagee** **:** there's a shady looking dude named rumlow who transferred from hydra 

**jessjones** **:** is he shady bc he's from hydra or is he shady bc he looks shady or is he shady bc he said smth shady 

**lukecagee** **:** d. all of the above 

**jessjones** **:** wow alright then 

**fogsnelson** **:** LMAO I KNOW RIGHT 

**fogsnelson** **:** this class is WILD 

**fogsnelson** **:** but!!! i met one of the new students 

**fogsnelson** **:** her name’s karen and she’s rlly nice 

**fogsnelson** **:** she just moved to ny!! 

_**fogsnelson** added **karenpage** to the chat_

**karenpage** **:** hi!! 

**fogsnelson** **:** this is our senior crew ig?? 

**jessjones** **:** hey my name is jessica 

**lukecagee** **:** hi i’m luke! i’m in your ap gov class :) 

**karenpage** **:** nice to meet you guys! 

**fogsnelson** **:** feel free to sit with us during lunch!! 

**karenpage** **:** thanks foggy! 

**danielrand** **:** oh welcome karen!! how’s mhs so far? 

**karenpage** **:** it’s a lot better than my old school dhsjhd 

**danielrand** **:** where’d you move from? 

**karenpage** **:** vermont! 

**lukecagee** **:** oh cool!! 

**danielrand** **:** y'all i'll go save our table :) 

**lukecagee** **:** thanks danny 

——— 

“ironfam” 

_**members:** _

bruce banner ( **greenbean** ) 

harley keener ( **garageguy** ) 

james rhodes ( **rhodeybear** ) 

pepper potts ( **saltnpeppa** ) 

peter parker ( **beterbarker** ) 

tony stark ( **ironstark** ) 

_tuesday, september 3_

**ironstark** **:** why the FUCK did a freshman just call me pops 

**beterbarker** **:** AHDKSHDKS HE ACTUALLY DID IT 

**beterbarker** **:** that’s my son!!!!!! 

**ironstark** **:** ... 

**ironstark** **:** wh 

**ironstark** **:** son????? 

**ironstark** **:** since WHEN 

**beterbarker** **:** miles!! i tutor him 

**ironstark** **:** OH 

**ironstark** **:** he’s your son now??? 

**beterbarker** **:** yes 

**ironstark** **:** but POPS?? 

**beterbarker** **:** you’re a grandpa now!! 

**ironstark** **:** ..... 

**ironstark** **:** i’m just 

**ironstark** **:** ok 

**garageguy** **:** LMAO IM SO PROUD OF MY NEPHEW 

**beterbarker** **:** :D 

**ironstark** **:** ........

**saltnpeppa** **:** ANTHONY EDWARD STARK 

**beterbarker** **:** oh shit 

**saltnpeppa** **:** WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU 

**beterbarker** **:** asdfhgj tony ur screwedddd 

**saltnpeppa** **:** bruce? 

**greenbean** **:** he's hiding in the closet 

**beterbarker** **:** sounds like a metaphor 

**ironstark** **:** BRUCIE HOW COULD YOU 

**ironstark** **:** BETRAYAL

**saltnpeppa** **:** stop cutting class tony 

**ironstark** **:** :(( 

**ironstark** **:** but coulson's so boringggg 

**ironstark** **:** he actually makes me do WORK 

**saltnpeppa** **:** this is literally SCHOOL 

**saltnpeppa** **:** you're expected to work 

**ironstark** **:** i don't like working!!! 

**saltnpeppa** **:** too bad! 

**saltnpeppa** **:** it's the FIRST day of school and you're already cutting??????? 

**ironstark** **:** two words pep 

**ironstark** **:** s c h o o l 

**ironstark** **:** s u c k s 

**garageguy** **:** ...can't argue witht hat 

**garageguy** **:** but honestly??? i wouldn't argue with pepper tony 

**garageguy** **:** she's scary 

**ironstark** **:** s c h o o l s u c k s 

**saltnpeppa** **:** well you're going to class anyways 

**ironstark** **:** nO 

**saltnpeppa** **:** yes 

**saltnpeppa** **:** :) 

**garageguy** **:** andddd they're gone 

——— 

“2 kewl 4 skool” 

_**members:** _

bruce banner ( **greenbean** ) 

clint barton ( **legolas** ) 

james rhodes ( **rhodeybear** ) 

natasha romanoff ( **blckwdw** ) 

sam wilson ( **falcon** ) 

steve rogers ( **icedamericano** ) 

thor odinson ( **lordofthunder** ) 

tony stark ( **ironstark** ) 

_tuesday, september 3_

_**blckwdw** added **jbbarnes** to the chat_

**blckwdw** **:** say hello to james 

**falcon** **:** hey welcome man 

**legolas** **:** hello to james 

**blckwdw** **:** fuck off clint 

**jbbarnes** **:** wow thanks 

**icedamericano** **:** Bucky? 

**jbbarnes:** steve? 

**jbbarnes:** holy shit its been so long 

**jbbarnes:** how r u 

**icedamericano:** I’m doing great! How are you? 

**jbbarnes:** i'm alright 

**jbbarnes:** damn it's been way too long 

**jbbarnes:** how's your mom doing? tell her i say hi! 

**icedamericano:** She's doing fine! I'll make sure to tell her. :) 

**falcon:** do you want to be called james or bucky? 

**jbbarnes:** honestly don't care lmao 

**falcon:** bucky it is 

**ironstark:** hey barnes 

**ironstark:** welcome to marvel high 

**ironstark:** glad to be out of hydra? 

**jbbarnes:** more than you know 

**jbbarnes:** it sucked 

**ironstark:** that's the general opinion on them 

**ironstark:** any info we should know abt the new tranfers? 

**jbbarnes:** idk them that well but rumlow's a dick 

**ironstark:** great thanks 

**blckwdw:** i knew dottie in freshman year 

**blckwdw:** she's alright?? bit of a tryhard 

**rhodeybear:** oh hey another james 

**rhodeybear:** welcome james my name is james 

**jbbarnes:** oh hey james it's nice to meet you 

**ironstark:** THIS IS RHODEY 

**ironstark:** I REFUSE TO CALL HIM JAMES 

**rhodeybear:** most ppl call me jim, tony's just stubborn 

**ironstark:** ok but why do we have so many francises? frances? 

**ironstark:** we have a frank castle, foggy counts as a francis since he's franklin, clint's middle name is francis (and his first name is clinton??? wtf???), and there's a jr named francis 

**ironstark:** and now we have a steven and a stephen 

**ironstark:** and a james and a james 

**rhodeybear:** don't ask me 

**jbbarnes:** eh 

**jbbarnes:** jim can be jim and i'll be bucky 

**ironstark:** we should get more creative with names 

**ironstark:** natasha's a cool name, i like natasha 

**ironstark:** although she introduced herself as natalie for the first month of school as a prank and i was sO confused 

**blckwdw:** that was pretty funny ngl 

**ironstark:** you exist to make fun of me 

**blckwdw:** oh absolutely 

**jbbarnes:** i call you natalia? 

**blckwdw:** eh that was my birth name 

**blckwdw:** my bio parents are sorta shit tho so i changed my name 

**jbbarnes:** should i not call you that? 

**blckwdw:** nah it's fine 

**ironstark:** we have a fucking SAM 

**falcon:** rude 

**ironstark:** and a THOR 

**ironstark:** thor is pretty creative if a bit pretentious 

**ironstark:** we have a bruce?? pretty cool but it makes me think of batman all the time 

**greenbean:** my first name is actually robert 

**ironstark:** ... 

**ironstark:** what 

**greenbean:** bruce is my middle name 

**ironstark:** wh 

**ironstark:** .... 

**ironstark:** WHAT THE FUCK 

**ironstark:** WHAT THE F U C K 

**ironstark:** MY LIFE HAS BEEN A FUCKING LIE 

**ironstark:** I COULDVE BEEN CALLING YOU BOB THIS WHOLE TIME??? 

**greenbean:** my dad decided my first name and my mom decided my middle name so 

**greenbean:** i go by my middle name 

**ironstark:** oh 

**ironstark:** alright 

**ironstark:** i can't believe this but i'll pretend to move on 

**ironstark:** moving on 

**ironstark:** we have an anthony edward which is weird as fuck 

**legolas:** EDWARD??? 

**ironstark:** SHUT UP CLINTON FRANCIS 

**ironstark:** andddd we have a steven grant rogers 

**jbbarnes:** i think i win the worst middle name 

**jbbarnes:** jAmEs bUcHaNaN bArNeS 

**ironstark:** mmm 

**ironstark:** yeah 

**ironstark:** yep 

**ironstark:** definitely the worst 

**ironstark:** anyways welcome to marvel high! 

**ironstark:** i hope you enjoy your stay 

——— 

“love of my life <3” 

_**members:** _

vanessa carlysle ( **nessalysle** ) 

wade wilson ( **mercwithamouth** ) 

_tuesday, september 3_

**mercwithamouth:** thank fuck school is over 

**mercwithamouth:** i miss vacation already 

**nessalysle:** it's literally been a single day 

**mercwithamouth:** i miss summer v a c a t i o n 

**nessalysle:** eh 

**nessalysle:** 179 days to go 

**nessalysle:** wade?? 

**nessalysle:** wade???? 

**nessalysle:** hey asshole you there 

**nessalysle:** i'm not going to ur funeral btw 

**nessalysle:** are you dead 

**nessalysle:** hey dickhead 

**mercwithamouth:** nessie i just met the most ADORABLE child ever 

**nessalysle:** oh you're alive 

**mercwithamouth:** her name’s ellie and i’m absolutely adopting her 

**nessalysle:** omg how many children do you HAVE 

**mercwithamouth:** ????? 

**nessalysle:** ellie phimister and yukio?? 

**mercwithamouth:** oh my god why do i have two ellies 

**mercwithamouth:** wtf 

**mercwithamouth:** either way they’re more like my,,, little sisters than children 

**mercwithamouth:** ANYWAYS 

**mercwithamouth:** let me tell you about eleanor “ellie” camacho 

**mercwithamouth:** i met her when she was yelling and cursing at a grown ass man 

**mercwithamouth:** fucking MAGNIFICIENT 

**mercwithamouth:** i think she’s like,, 9 as well or smth 

**mercwithamouth:** if i ever have a child i want them to be like ellie 

**nessalysle:** awwwwwww 

**mercwithamouth:** i met her parents and they said i could babysit :))) 

**nessalysle:** can i meet her?? 

**mercwithamouth:** we’ll see!!!! 

**mercwithamouth:** pls do tho she’s amazing :””) 

**nessalysle:** also i heard you got a new job 

**mercwithamouth:** yeah loki got mad at one of the students so 

**mercwithamouth:** $$$ 

**mercwithamouth:** let's get ice cream when i'm done 

**nessalysle:** can't :( 

**mercwithamouth:** awww why not 

**nessalysle:** busy :( 

**mercwithamouth:** with what? 

**nessalysle:** uhhh 

**mercwithamouth:** nah it's ok 

**mercwithamouth:** you don't have to tell me 

**mercwithamouth:** just stay safe 

**nessalysle:** i will 

**nessalysle:** ily wade 

**mercwithamouth:** ily ness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like ned and foggy would be those texters who uses a ton of exclamation points
> 
> you know how you act a certain way with one group of people and a different way with another?? i’m trying to make peter accurately reflect that but idk if that’s working dhjshd
> 
> for jessica's hair, imagine her regular hair but with the tips dyed the color of her hair when she was jewel in the comics
> 
> apparently karen is actually from vermont?? according to marvel.com so that’s p cool ig
> 
> a huge part of this fic will be the vanessa and wade friendship and the harry and peter friendship btw!!
> 
> just a question that i'm not rlly expecting anyone to answer, but do u think i should add some prose in here?? like chats they have in person and all that?? lowkey want to but i'm not sure if it'd fit
> 
> thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> so this is my first fic on ao3 and i’m super sorry if the formatting is all messed up and the characters are ooc (making everyone have their own texting style is STRESSFUL y’all!! wade's used to have a bunch of abbreviations but it got super annoying to type out so i just changed it oops)
> 
> not rlly expecting anyone to comment on this, but if you do, pls tell me what u think and if i should fix anything!! i’m vvv open to criticism and if there’s anything that bothers you, please please please let me know because I don’t want to make y’all feel uncomfortable :(
> 
> thanks for reading!


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